Yesterday I was playing cowboys with The Kid (we even had our own make believe lasso) when I had the strongest memory flashback. It's amazing the kind of things that can happen to a person and one can put so far out of their minds that the person can't even remember it happening anymore.

It was horrible and I started crying inconsolably. My "father" and I use the term loosely, tied my hands together and my feet together and then tied them to each other in such a way that I had to be laying down on the ground because I couldn't sit up or stand up straight. He did the same to my sister, he also gave us a beating beforehand. Our crime? I can't remember, but if it's anything like previous times that we got beat, it was probably because my mom didn't western union him all the money that she got from her paycheck. I can't remember the exact age I was at the time, all I know is that we lived in that apartment from when I was around six until I was eight. God, if I ever think of doing something like that to one of my children; please smite me. I don't ever want to inflict that kind of pain on a child, any child.

runs off to cry...